Sources from Hell Confirm that Demons Didn't Do Their Job, Couldn't Hang Out with Tonga

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After inquiring to St. Peter and other angels at the Pearly Gates, representatives at "Focus on the Family" mistakenly entered Tonga as a demon. We will try to do better by Jeff and Shaleia and keep a stricter, moral hold on family life.

We regret to inform our members that Tonga, Duchess and Frankenfurter are actually a trio of canine angels in Heaven and while we realize this is not what our members want to hear, we will try to get more animals into the happening place of fire and brimstone. They haven't met Jazmine yet though St. Francis of Assisi has assured the three that she is a very good dog and that they will enjoy her company. Jazmine has since forgiven the bee whose wings she ripped off when it came near baby Alexis before that rotten child became an adult and got busted for cocaine use.

Keep raising your vibes/Thetan levels and one day you will break the running/chasing stage too!

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