I Got a Weird Channeled Message. Help Pls.?

Dear "divine feminine",
You don’t understand how much I avoided you thinking you were being seen by a licensed medical professional. You always thought I did not love you. You are correct.
In your mind, I did not even say goodbye on my dead bed. If I am dying, I would rather be by my wife's side having raised my kids to stay away from your cult.
I did not ask you to stay after I fell down of seizure. The EMTs are perfectly capable of lifting me onto a stretcher and getting me necessary treatment for my epilepsy.
I did not contact you for a decade nor send you any messages because I am married with kids. We wish you had gone to jail for stalking us.
That’s only because I love my family so much that I always thought the judge's decisions were too good for you and carefully one-sided in the name of "discrimination".
Did I want you to think I had nothing to offer before I could ask for your hands to quit touching me every time I see you (regrettably) in public?
You call that EGO, I call it my inner desire to protect my wife and kids. I did not want you to think of me as a dying, sick, unavailable, playboy type of the man. I would never cheat with you. Stop looking up my address every time we move.
BECAUSE, my wife deserves the best of the best and that means I need to stay loyal to her.
I asked you repeatedly to stop contacting my wife, yet you declined. Because you thought I did not love you enough.
I had no words to describe how I felt, though I could tell from your eyes that you were desperate for me more than any soul ever did in this world.
I didn’t get a chance to show you what I could do to repay my wife for that. I was not even given a voice in court to restrain you, but you are given ears to hear me through your "Holy Spirit" or whatever you weird cult members are into. If you accepted me, you would be respectful of my marriage and kids.
I made this vow even after my body returned to ash around you.
My soul would always be with you in your head, to provide, protect and cherish my until eternity.l which you cannot seem to forget.
Forever bugger off,
Your "divine masculine"

Could a psychic help translate that channeled message? I'm not sure I'm getting it. Might be some negative and karmic forces in my aura, hang on lemme get out the cards and sage real quick.