Don't Believe the Media, Phil Collins is Really Dead

Rumors have been circulating in various media outlets on the current health status of famed drummer, lead singer of "Surah al Fatiha", Phil Collins.

After an autopsy was performed, several months later, we can confirm that Mr. Collins died of a heart attack after a fan tried to perform an invisible touch on him sneaking up behind his back.

We are so sorry he died. Sometimes Christians believe men can resurrect from the dead. That's just stuff the Western World tells you. It's all evil.

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